I love men. I love black men. How could one not appreciate the resiliency, courageousness and fortitude that is present and actually necessary to face this world in its current state.

It’s impressive, truly.

However, as much as I love ya, as I much as I appreciate ya, we (women), as an entire collective gender (this is gonna be a bit controversial so stay with it) DO NOT CARE IF YOU LIKE US WEARING WEDGES.

Furthermore, we do not care about most things you like enough to the point that we will stop doing what WE like to do.

At least, we shouldn’t.

I appreciate an opinionated human as much as the next gal. By all means, express your wants and desires of what attracts you, what you think about what you want, and what makes you happy.

Here’s where you go astray. By no means is your inclination or proclivity for certain aspects of a woman’s physicality the law of the land. It’s been made clear that men are visual beings and are drawn to the allure of what they can see directly in front of them. In short, a woman’s appearance is uber important to kickstart most men’s interest. We get it.

Scarily enough, it is the worldly awareness of this notion that encourages the extremes that many women are willing to go to in order to be viewed as beautiful. Oh yes, I know you all love how many women are getting those explosive butt implants (sooooo attractive) and using all that makeup “sorcery” to grab your attention.


No, not all makeup is bad.  Breathe and reread before crawling into feelings. Thanks.


The point is that there has to be some middle ground.

Sweeping generalizations have never been my thing. By no means do all men express themselves this way, but I gotta say, the ones that do tend to be the loudest and are heard the most by people who should be exposed to it the least. The men who choose to forcefully holla at women on the streets or insist upon using their Twitter fingers to lambast that which is “beneath” them but laud the very superficial angles of their desire tend to be the ones who are front and center, being just as narrow-minded as they wanna be.

I’m sure there is some way to communicate likes and dislikes without condemning what others DO like in the process. After all, we are positioning ourselves as adults in this world.

If you’re able to narrow down what it is that you want out here, awesome. Your preference, though, is just that. Women are not Stepford Wives or robots for that matter. Ok, so maybe you don’t like the idea of that woman wearing wedges, (I promise I don’t understand why there seems to be such a deep demise for this shoe. It is a shoe on a foot for goodness’ sake) but so what? Women will not and should not fit into one mold. Cause that’s actually wack. 

Educator. Black. A woman. I’m an outspoken introvert. Consummate over-thinker. Sassy and simply complex with the courage of all of my convictions. I will debate you til the death and then hug you when it’s all over.  A millennial who feels there are few things better than the 90’s. On the greatest of days, I manage to get all of it on paper.