Successful: It’s what everyone wants to be, regardless of how they define what success looks like for them. When you’re having a difficult time making your definition of success come to life and your friends all seem to be successful personally, professionally, or in both regards, it can be disheartening. You might become depressed, close yourself off from your friends, or stick around but become bitter. It’s easy to slip into a mentality of negativity when things aren’t going your way, but I would encourage anyone in this predicament to take these reminders into account:

Your path to success is custom made

The path to whatever you’re trying to accomplish will not look like anyone else’s. For example: If you’re an entrepreneur, you should know that it’s a marathon out here. Starting your own business takes more time and energy than having traditional employment. Understand, own and embrace that it might take longer, there might be twists and turns, and that as long as you’re trying, you’re not failing.

Comparison is the thief of joy

This is one of my favorite quotes (by Theodore Roosevelt). It encourages us not to lose ourselves by comparing our lives to that of others. Are you chronically single, and it seems like all of your friends are getting boo’d up or married? It might be difficult not to compare, but ask yourself how your relationship with you is going. Keep setting personal goals specific to yourself, and maintain eye contact with those goals.

Success is not a checkbox

It’s not like you set a goal, accomplish it and BAM! You’re successful. I know I have to constantly remind myself that success is both an idea and a journey. Of course, I set markers for myself — landmarks, if you will — to help measure my progress. Another favorite quote of mine is by George Bernard Shaw, who says: “Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” You are your greatest masterpiece, your most challenging and important work of art, so celebrate the small victories as steps toward creating the success you want.

Everyone has challenges, you just might not be privy

Your girl has a good man, they have a cute little toddler, just bought a house and she’s been promoted at her job. It looks fantastic from the outside. Little do you know, her promotion came just in time because he was just laid off, their cute little toddler has been diagnosed with a learning disability, and she just found out she can’t have more kids. I’m being extreme here, but we really don’t know every single challenge our perceived ‘successful’
friends are facing.

You will get there if you keep going

Opportunity favors the prepared. This is a mantra of mine. I believe that every moment I spend preparing myself for the opportunities I’m working toward will make me ready when they arise. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, because belief is the first step toward manifestation. After that, it’s about doing the thing that you say you want to do. Want to be a singer? Start writing your own songs or build your production skills. Want to be in graphic design? Start designing for your dream companies. It’s not about nailing the dream gig now or finding the right relationship now, it’s about preparing yourself for that inevitable moment (or those inevitable moments, because there will be more than one) of glory.

Ultimately, I know it sucks to feel as though everyone else is doing better or more or is closer to their dreams, but your effort matters. You are a success in progress, so keep moving forward.

 


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