B. Smith's Husband Criticized Online For Having A Girlfriend While His Wife Endures Alzheimer's
Dan Gasby blamed the backlash to his new relationship on racism.
January 29, 2019 at 10:10 pm
Some fans of lifestyle mogul B. Smith have a problem with her husband’s new relationship.
Smith and her husband, Dan Gasby, presented a united front when they revealed her Alzheimer’s diagnosis in 2013. The couple co-wrote a book, and Gasby has spoken openly about their struggles since receiving the heartbreaking news.
“It’s the toughest thing I’ve ever dealt with,” he told People Magazine in 2016. “Anybody who is an Alzheimer’s caregiver knows exactly what other caregivers are going through. It’s 24/7. The complexity and the intensity of it is very tough.”
As Gasby continued to care for Smith, he revealed he’d found a new love in December.
“To steal the title from 50 Cent & The Game … ‘Hate it or Love it!’ You can debate, but for me I’m just feelin’ great! Life’s to short to ask for a rebate so I’m gonna surf thru life before it’s toooo late!!!#whylie,” he captioned a picture of him and his girlfriend, Alex Lerner, posted to Facebook in December.
Pictures of Lerner at home with Smith and Gasby soon followed. Online, Gasby’s openness about the situation has begun to spur backlash.
My mother + aunt had Alzheimer’s. It’s rough.
That said, it’s a VIOLATION of his MARITAL VOWS to have his “girlfriend” in the house he shares with his wife— that SHE PAID FOR, with a lifetime of hard work as a model, restaurateur + cookbook author!
Dan Gasby is fucking trash. pic.twitter.com/du52GkNLKt
— #ThanksPresidentPelosi! (@TheMominatrixx) January 29, 2019
I pray for #BSmith! Her Husband Dan Gasby and mistress Alex Lerner are terrible human beings! I know B smith got distance relatives and need check her overall health make sure these two jokers arent accelerating her illness or draining her money!
— The_Page_of_Eli (@AutoPhileNoire) January 29, 2019
Dan Gasby has been airing his dirty laundry on facebook for years. For years, sometimes daily. I really think he went down the wrong road. Airing this is wrong, she doesn’t know what’s going on. And doesn’t know what’s up w this new woman IN THEIR HOME. He’s disgusting
— p willoughby (@PamiWilloughby) January 29, 2019
Yes, Dan Gasby aint sh*t! I know Ms. B, wouldn’t be okay with these shananagans! ????
— Rojoe (@bklala99) January 29, 2019
But he was quick to clap back, calling his critics "ignorant" on Facebook. He added he feels only those who are full-time caregivers to a spouse with Alzheimer’s can understand what his life is like and wrote, "I love my wife but I can’t let her take away my life!"
Gasby opened up further in a new Washington Post profile. He told the paper he believes the vitriol came from people who had an issue with Lerner’s race.
“I have been married to a Black woman for 26 years,” he said. “I have a Ph.D. in Black love.”
The piece also explored Gasby and Lerner’s love story. They started as friends, and Lerner wanted to keep it platonic for a while.
"We were friends,” Lerner recalled. “I didn’t want to go out with a married man.”
As she got to know Gasby, she said she realized he “he is not a man cheating on his wife.” His love for Smith impressed Lerner.
“What I admire about him is that he takes care of her,” Lerner said.
The native German also became one of Smith's caretakers.
“If I can be compassionate to her if I can do anything for her, it makes me feel good,” said Lerner. “If it is giving her something to drink, or making her something to eat — she loves to eat — I feel good.”
Dana, Gasby’s daughter from a previous relationship, also gave the relationship her blessing. The 32-year-old moved into the home to share the duty of looking after Smith.
"When he told me I was like, 'Thank God. I'm happy,'" she said. What Dana doesn’t like is her dad’s social media behavior.
“I tell him all the time to be careful with what he posts,” she said. “I say, ‘Look, You’re going to make people mad. You either have to be okay with that, or you have to change.’”
Gasby insists he’s told his wife about Lerner but admitted Smith’s illness makes it difficult for her to internalize information.
Smith’s decline is evident. The woman once known as “the Black Martha Stewart” has issues with her short-term memory and speaks in short, incoherent sentences. During the Post interview, she talked to Lerner about a non-existent baby and didn’t recognize herself in a photograph.
Despite the challenges, Gasby remains by her side. Dana said her father's dedication is evident through the fact he’s never left or placed his wife of 26 years in a home.
“She’s in this house,” Dana said. “She’s here every day.”
Blavitize your inbox! Join our daily newsletter for fresh stories and breaking news.
Now, check these out: