Jeena Wilder, a mother of five children, posted a video clip on TikTok about how her family steers invitations to birthday parties when only one of her children is invited.
In the video, the 32-year-old is seen smiling while holding a makeshift invitation card.
"When you invite one of my children to a birthday party, you invite one child, you get all of us," she said.
She then turned from the camera and danced in the opposite direction to the "Hillbilly Type Beat" by Dadood, with a line of her kids, ranging from 4 months to 9 years old, following behind her. At the end of the clip, Wilder's husband is seen carrying their infant child as a note on the screen reads, "Don't worry, we bring awesome gifts."
Are you team just the invited child goes or team the whole family?! My husband works a lot and most days it’s just me and the kids! I always RSVP or ask the parents first. #largefamily
The video spread like wildfire and amassed 1 million views on TikTok and Twitter. Many TikTok users opined about Wilder's parenting style in relation to the acceptable etiquette of whether her family should attend another child's birthday party. However, Wilder assured she is considerate of other parents when it comes to birthday-party etiquette.
"My husband works Monday through Saturday, [and] in the summer he has even longer hours, so I barely see him. Most days, it’s just me and the kiddos. I’m not okay with dropping my kids off at a birthday party solo. So, my solution is: I always ask beforehand if I can bring siblings to the party and always pay for the ones that weren’t invited if the party is at an event place," she told BuzzFeed.
"I never pressure parents or feel entitled to take my family to children's birthday parties. But for me, I hate the idea of just dropping my kids off somewhere and picking them up hours later, but I also hate the idea of a child not having anyone show up to their birthday party. When my kids are older and I feel like they can understand what to do to keep themselves safe, I will feel comfortable with dropping them off at parties and picking them up later, but at this young age, it's not happening," she added.
The cheerful video created by the stay-at-home mother also highlighted a serious concern over the safety of her children.
"There is also a safety component to it as well. If you don’t know the parents extremely well, why would you just drop your children at their home? It’s the same reason why we don’t do sleepovers. You don’t know what goes on in other people's households and you don’t want to expose your children to that," Wilder told BuzzFeed.
"It's how my parents and family members did it," she continued. "You have a baby shower? The whole family goes. You have a graduation party? The whole family goes. You have a birthday party? The whole family goes. Haitians are very family-oriented, so we just do things as a family."