Today was supposed to be my day off.
Exclusive image of me when I woke up on this Friday, thinking that I had nothing to do.
But, I saw Jaheim trending and knew I needed to investigate why.
When I took a peek at the shenanigans, I realized my day was over before it even started.
When Jaheim is the number 1 trending thing it means today will be of no substance on twitter lol,
— Terrance Knighton (@MisterRoast98) October 21, 2016
Let’s begin. My curiosity was heightened when I saw a photo of the R&B artist circulating on the web Thursday, however I just thought folks were just making much ado about nothing…kinda like the whole Yung Joc thing.
Exhibit A.
Clearly, Jaheim has been using some sort of wave cap with bionic powers to make his hair lay like a newborn.
Why you mad tho ♂️? pic.twitter.com/LDaLN8bLQX
— Jaheim Hoagland (@officialjaheim) October 21, 2016
This is my hair I have many choices I’m very comfortable in my skin I can even cut it all & regrow I have choices pic.twitter.com/1ShSeCRRFv
— Jaheim Hoagland (@officialjaheim) October 21, 2016
Because, honestly. Truly. Jaheim experienced a major glowup in the last 30 days.
When someone’s on the phone and you here them mention being w/you know’n you where suppose to be OT pic.twitter.com/sntL5v5CM8
— Jaheim Hoagland (@officialjaheim) September 10, 2016
But that’s his business. Who are we to judge?
I spoke too soon.
So a new morning has arrived, which means we’re all in for a fresh episode of The Breakfast Club and Charlamagne Tha God’s “Donkey of the Day” segment.
Jaheim became the latest subject of entertainment.
#DonkeyOfTheDay goes to #Jaheim for responding to hair style critics after getting roasted on social media. pic.twitter.com/u07r343For
— REVOLT TV (@RevoltTV) October 21, 2016
And he quickly caught wind that he was talk of the airwaves..and soon to be social media.
I’ma give you a donkey right on yo eye pussy it’s on sight pic.twitter.com/PsSdaKhxVO
— Jaheim Hoagland (@officialjaheim) October 21, 2016
Things quickly escalated on IG.
And of course, Charlamagne does what he is notoriously known for..adding fuel to the fire.
RT @officialjaheim: I’ma give you a donkey right on yo eye pussy it’s on sight pic.twitter.com/QfD9TBaAaL
— Charlamagne Tha God (@cthagod) October 21, 2016
Why you tweeting yourself? https://t.co/rpDAazHAl4
— Charlamagne Tha God (@cthagod) October 21, 2016
Jaheim act like its my fault his hair not long enough for a press and curl….
— Charlamagne Tha God (@cthagod) October 21, 2016
he happy to gain more followers? I’m so confused. https://t.co/AiI9iWBELP
— Charlamagne Tha God (@cthagod) October 21, 2016
But it was far too late. The Internet won this round.
I’m sorry but you can’t tell me that Jaheim don’t look like Holiday Heart pic.twitter.com/cGP92Pdw4M
— Boobie. (@QueenKeiko) October 21, 2016
Why Jaheim out here lookin like Jamie Foxx in Amazing Spiderman? pic.twitter.com/DZ5GPdW9wN
— Guerilla Blaq (@TX_Silverback) October 21, 2016
I’m not gonna make no jokes on Jaheim because he taught me how to spell on Fabulous when I was 9.
— Muscle Flexbrook (@Kontra402) October 21, 2016
I saw Jaheim was trending and thought he died, but it’s way worse than that.
— Petty Nelly (@CocoShaneal) October 21, 2016
NEW: The Perm Album by: Jaheim
Perming My Way Back
Perm That Woman 1st
Perm In Da Ruff
Back In My Perm
Ready, Perming, & Able
Struggle Perm— 2Cents (@JonesLenai) October 21, 2016
Jaheim at a Star Trek convention: pic.twitter.com/d8YoZQTrpc
— Matthew Kick (@MatthewKick) October 21, 2016
Jaheim never went to sleep! He’s been tweeting with his satin cap on for a good 12+ hours!
HELP ME! pic.twitter.com/iNPbPVJjOo
— ᴅᴏʟʟᴀʀ (@callmedollar) October 21, 2016
If Jaheim wouldve shut up & let the slander pass, this wouldve died last night. But no, he had to try to be the Creamy Crack Clapback King.
— i be chillin. (@HBfromKC) October 21, 2016
Both these Aunties got all the family dirt and secrets. Who you trusting to spill it all first? pic.twitter.com/WVeNRDiuxL
— . (@ktgonkt) October 21, 2016
Stylist: What can I do for you today?
Jaheim: I want that David Ruffin from ’66 but low in the front.
Stylist: Say no more, fam. pic.twitter.com/kBT4EWZn2x
— #PrayForBlackLives (@Mo_Rease) October 21, 2016
I even spotted one of my writers in the mix with a tune of encouragement
Hey @officialjaheim… pic.twitter.com/O3h1MbEu03
— Ira (@IraHobbsJr) October 21, 2016
And now you know the rest of the story.
Alas, my quiet day off can now resume.