This very statement broke my heart instantly. Trying to articulate my thoughts carefully, I asked my daughter why she felt this way. “It just looks prettier than tan skin,” she said. My mind began to race. I started thinking about what would have influenced her to form this opinion. Then it hit me — television, advertisements and toys.

When it comes to racism, it’s fair to say that society has come a long way but there’s still work that needs to be done. Through society’s constant messages, brown babies are subliminally being taught that the lighter their skin, the better. From television commercials (which predominantly feature pretty little White girls) to the plethora of White dolls that can be found filling aisles at your nearest toy store, it’s difficult to deny that our society promotes fairer skin.


After coming to the understanding of where my daughter was getting these ideas, I made it my mission to make sure she knew how beautiful she was. I began to compliment her every chance I got. I also made sure that if we purchased any dolls, they looked just like her.

Now, one year later, my daughter’s self esteem is through the roof! I felt it necessary to share my story that so any other mothers dealing with a similar struggle can relate and see the positive changes that occur from a few simple changes in the way we parent. Something as small as saying “you look beautiful today,” or even “girly” activities such as manicures or playing in makeup can aid in instilling self-love and certainty. Other options could consist of mommy/daughter time each week (an essential) and lots of hugs and kisses! Emphasizing your daughter’s importance can go long a way. After all, it’s our job to keep raising strong and confident daughters.

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