21 Things Black Women Don’t Hear Often Enough
May 21, 2015 at 4:00 am
Below is a must-read list based off of the many others like it that simply miss the mark. If you're sick of lists for women that exclude any of us not living storybook perfect lives, this one's for you.
- Love yourself while empowering and turning up for your sisters and brothers, elders and youngsters who are working to make the world a better place to exist in.
- Realize we often gotta WERQ twice as hard (for half as much).
- Don't let invisible privilege, daily systematic/institutionalized/social micro- and macro-aggressions of racism, sexism, bigotry, supremacy, misogyny among other oppressive realities keep you from being great. Recognize that it's real and okay to feel like #youjustcantwiththeworld on certain days.
- Feel empowered not to mess with people at times. "Me time" is important.
- Get that .78 cents to a man's dollar [read:money]. #GirlsJustWannaHaveFunds.
- Don't let people refer to you as sassy, especially in a professional space. It’s a racially-charged label rooted in a stereotype, oftentimes reserved for black women. Women of color in the workplace who are assertive are NOT being sassy. They're being assertive.
- Do you at all times and realize that some people make it their full-time job to hate and troll. With a select few putting in mad overtime and because they're THAT serious about the haterade. Don't let anybody keep you down.
- Know and get to know your body just as anyone and everyone should.
- DO YOU BOO BOO. But if you still have a ring-back tone, maybe consider letting that one go...
- Start building credit when you can; it's helpful (if not lowkey necessary) to have a credit history that's in good standing when the time comes that you want to take that next financial step. Watch out for high APRs, annual fees, companies that don't give you permanent rewards and an introductory 0% APR rate. Do not be swindled!
- Read. Watch. Share. Listen. Listen. Listen. Consume. Create. Question.
- Work on your comedic/conversational timing. It comes in handy during small-talk situations. For example this would come in handy when just you and one other person are on the elevator and it’s someone you know or have seen around, and you're like “Oh snap — should I say something? Because I kind of want to.... Nah, I'll just look at my phone or act like I'm alone," even though there's somebody right next to you potentially thinking the same thing and there's no kind of elevator music playing in the background because (much like ring-back tones) places finally realized that ish was wack.
- Try to eat healthier — whatever that means to you. I've tried to eliminate soda and drink more water (which is cheaper I suppose). Also, I’m really trying to slow my roll with that sugar. African-Americans are disproportionately affected by Diabetes.
- Celebrate all the tiny and big successes, but don’t be afraid to fail every now and then. Sometimes it takes 99 failures just to see one success. Sometimes it takes one failure to see one success. Sometimes it takes 2,403 failures only to see no success, and sometimes you just might stay #winning with successes on successes — #Blessed. You get the point. Try to work toward something greater.
- Expect and work for more.
- Lift as you climb. Please lift as you climb.
- Take personal days to do exactly what you want — whether that's staying in bed all day, eating an entire block of Trader Joe's cheese, volunteering, writing, re-reading Feminism Is For Everybody (shameless plug for bell), making lists on lists, thrift shopping, raging at the club, binge watching Scandal or anything else that makes your day perfect.
- Know that you're beautiful. It's true. You bad!
- Practice thoughtfulness, present-mindedness and kindness. Be a bridge for others. Be thankful for errbody who's helped you get to where you are now. Keep faith in whatever and/or whoever you believe in.
- Call/visit/write/email/text/fax/pigeon/slide in the DMs of those you love and tell them why they rock and inspire you.