Can I Have Your Number? Asking For Your Partner's Credit Score While You’re Dating
Imagine you’re thinking about making this ‘potential’ who you’ve been dating for the past few months 'bae.' I mean personality and sense of humor are out of this world, good head on their shoulders, they respect their momma and most importantly they treat you right.
What’s next? Well, if you’re absolutely serious about this person being bae, you have to ask them about their credit score. A credit score is a three-digit number, ranging from 300 to 850, that determines an individual’s financial health. Meaning if you want to buy a car, rent an apartment or apply for student loans, whether or not you get approved is based on your credit score. Get a free credit score reading on sites like Credit Karma.
Trust us, we know it’s not one of the sexiest or easiest topics of conversations to have on a date, but it’s one that must be had. But if you’re not thinking about building a future with this person, why bother asking them for the credit score, right? After all, surveys show that the number one cause for divorce is conversations about money.
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Kristen Euretig, certified financial planner and founder of Brooklyn Plans, LLC, says asking someone for their credit score is none of your business until you’re getting to a point where you’re talking about merging lives. Believe it or not, there are also credit score dating websites.
Euretig recommended Credit Score Dating, where like-minded, financially-savvy individuals can find each other. Connecting people with the same views on money and money personalities minimizes the stress that money can bring into relationships.
Here are a few questions to ask yourself if and when you should ask potential bae their credit score.
Are they producing good fruit?
Two things that I’ve learned when it comes to dating is to pay attention to the red flags and you can always tell someone by the fruit they produce.
For instance, are they nonchalant about paying bills late, do they have financial goals set in place, or do they always run their credit cards to the max? Are they financially savvy and use Groupon or LivingSocial deals when you go on dates? Aside from financially, how are they as a person? Do they apologize when they’re wrong? Do they stimulate your mind, or does dating this person magnify your weaknesses?
If the answers to those questions aren’t as good as you hoped, it’s not too late to make a U-turn and steer clear of a potential disaster.
Is this a person I can see myself with?
It may be a bit early to ask this question, but it’s necessary. This question alone helps you with the process of elimination. Asking yourself if this a person you can see yourself with for the long run helps you not only keep your dating life simple, but if the answer is no, you won’t waste each other’s time.
If this is someone you can see yourself with, proceed to question three.
When is the right time to ask?
When it boils down to having these important conversations, you must remember that there’s a time and place for everything. Asking someone for their credit score is not like asking someone their favorite color. Depending on the person and their financial history, asking them for their credit score is considered very personal, especially if they’ve struggled in the past.
Don’t have these financial discussions in closed places where other people can listen in like on the train, a plane or even at the movies. As an alternative, you can ask your date these questions at dinner, in the car with just you two or at each other’s places.
Aside from where to have this convo, the conversation must be right. Going from talking about Phil Jackson and the Knicks going their separate ways to talking about your credit scores is not only random but can throw the conversation off. You can start off by asking them about their career and financial goals and if they plan on traveling. As your date goes into depth about their financial goals, perhaps you can ask them their credit score. It's vital to not push too hard if they’re not ready to open up.
If you have great vibes and chemistry, the conversation will lead itself!