Kelly Rowland opened up about her relationship with her father when she co-hosted Today With Hoda & Jenna on Tuesday. Joining her father, Christopher Lovett, on the show, Rowland reflected on the pair’s effort to rebuild a fractured relationship. The Destiny’s Child singer, who spent more than 30 years without speaking to her father, said she was angry at him as a child because she felt abandoned.

“My understanding of where my dad was as a kid was that he was not really ready as a father,” Rowland said. “I was angry at him, I was disappointed in him, I had all those feelings of abandonment. I think as a kid you just feel like if they’re not there, they don’t want to be. So that’s what I felt and that feeling sucked.”