That inevitable, gut-wrenching, reality-setting-in moment in my career just happened. Someone made an asinine assumption about me as it relates to my profession. I am a black lawyer…or a lawyer who is black (however the world may see it). Apparently, there is a distinction. To add to that conundrum, I am also a woman. A “double minority”—especially true in my career, in which black people account for approximately 4 percent of the entire legal profession, and female attorneys account for approximately 35 percent of this historically white male-dominated profession.

A client (with whom I have had one-on-one, in-person interaction and extensive email correspondence, which includes a lengthy email signature indicating my title) told me that she assumed I was an intern. Naturally, I felt slighted. What about me depicted an intern? That particular day, I was introduced by a senior attorney as “Counsel” to the other individuals in the conference room. I wore a gray skirt suit, and stood six feet and three inches tall (I’m naturally five feet and eleven inches tall without high heels, and I only mention that because there is some correlation between height and authority status in the workplace). I also handed out my business card, which prominently features a corporate logo. Despite all the obvious and subtle signs, the client nevertheless assumed I was not an employee at the law office in the very same conference room in which she sat. She assumed I was an intern. The help.

After I relayed the conversation I had with the client to a coworker of mine —a white male—the first inference offered was that I looked young for my age. The next explanation given was that the client was an older white woman who did not graduate from college and probably grew up in an era where racial intolerance was particularly high. Maybe I am blessed with good genes, and I don’t look like I’m 32 years old (Thanks mom!). Or maybe the client had never seen a black lawyer up close, in person and couldn’t even fathom how I could hold such a position at a prestigious law firm. Whatever the reasoning, there was no justification for such a comment. I knew exactly where it was coming from.

In my moment of reflection (once my feelings of disgust and anger had subsided) I recalled the instances as told by my colleagues, who are black male lawyers, when they walk into courtrooms, business suit on, briefcase in hand, are constantly mistaken for the defendant, or the countless times it was assumed people of color earned a position because of affirmative action. I also remembered the story of the black woman on the airplane who offered to help an unresponsive passenger during the flight, but was rejected from doing so because the flight attendant did not believe she was a doctor. You know what they say about making assumptions…

When I discussed my experience with seasoned attorneys, it was brushed off and trivialized. I could imagine them saying, “Quit complaining, girl. In my day, it was worse,” as if there is some type of cash prize offered for one-upping one deplorable moment for another. The fact of the matter is that we all shared something in common: we were all recipients of implicit bias.

Implicit or unconscious bias is forming a certain attitude towards or associating stereotypes with a group of people without a conscious knowledge or an intention of doing so. Implicit bias resides on a deeper, unknowing level in our minds and affects our understanding, decisions, and behaviors. Whether my encounter was blatant bigotry or implicit bias, it has no place in the workplace or in our community.

What can we do to change the status quo when implicit bias is so ingrained in our society? Although difficult to identify introspectively, you can see the implications of implicit bias in print advertisements, TV commercials, news, politics, law enforcement, the judicial system and, in my case, the workplace. While we may not be able to change everyone’s perceptions overnight, here are a few key approaches on how to deal with implicit bias if (or when) you find yourself in a similar situation:

• You do have a right to feel upset or angry if someone insults you, makes a ridiculous assumption or mistreats you. 

• However, carrying negative feelings with you over time will eventually create a bitter, unhappy person. You will likely develop an implicit bias towards the same group of people who had an implicit bias towards you. Don’t perpetuate the very same thing that you are trying to eliminate. 
• Keep in mind that someone’s implicit bias towards you is a reflection of their own personal thoughts and attitudes. Don’t take it personal or accept it as truth. No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. 
• When tempers have cooled, and it is safe and wise to do so, have a conversation with the person about what happened. It is often suggested to lead the conversation with how you felt rather than emphasize what they did or said. Obviously, use your better judgment on this one. If your goal is to maintain a civil relationship with this person, then you may want to address the issue. But if there is no intention to interact with this person again, it may be best to just let it go. 
• Don’t attack the person and accuse them of being a racist, sexist, etc. Turn this conversation into a teachable moment, if you can. Ignorance isn’t always bliss. 
It is important to note that even the most educated, liberal, open-minded and “woke” person can harbor a plethora of implicit biases. Granted, we all view the world through different lenses, but if we make a conscious effort not to rush to judgment when we initially perceive others, we will take a step in the right direction.