The holidays can be a stressful time of year. Looking for the perfect gift, attending parties & events, and spending time with family can be triggering. Even though nothing negative is occurring per se, you can still be stressed. Not all stress is necessarily a negative event or situation. Stress can be staying up late wrapping presents Christmas Eve and sneaking them under the tree before your kids wake up. Even if it is something that you enjoy, the pressure for perfection can be stressful. Our bodies perceive various different occurrences and situations as stress. Hosting your entire family for a holiday dinner, or simply attending a holiday dinner with family can be anxiety producing. So, yes the holidays can be both happy and stressful at the same time.

In order to survive this holiday season let's start by setting boundaries. A quick example; your uncle and father always annoy everyone during Christmas dinner by arguing over politics. Set boundaries and expectations by implementing a rule that prohibits discussing politics. Don't want to get stuck cleaning all night because everyone finally left around 12am? Set a strict start and end time for dinner. Explain to everyone ahead of time that there will be a departure time. Being able to be assertive and set boundaries and limitations is key. And not just during the holidays! This is something that you should work on incorporating into your everyday life if you don't already.

In addition to setting boundaries feel free to take a break. It's perfectly fine and acceptable to take a break to get some air, take some deep breaths, and reset if you're feeling overwhelmed. No one will probably notice you've even been gone for 5-10 minutes.

My next tip is to say NO. It kind of fits in with setting boundaries, but it's important to know that it is 1000% ok to say no. You're not obligated to do anything that anyone asks of you. The holidays in general, large gatherings, and family members can be triggering! You still have a few weeks to take some time to identify if and what some of your triggers might be. Once you are aware of your triggers, think of some ways to minimize your exposure to them. If that's not possible then have some effective coping skills in your back pocket that you can whip out and utilize if need be.

Lastly, always take care of yourself! The holidays are often a crazy whirlwind and can leave you feeling depleted and dehydrated (if you partake in the spirits to help get you in the spirit as I tend to do) so self-care is important. Come up with a post holiday self-care routine that can help ease you back into your regular routine. A nice bath, indulging in some of your gifts, enjoying some quiet/alone time, etc., doesn't matter what you decide to do but I firmly suggest you engage in something.

Happy Holidays!

Micia Harris

Writing since December 2017 · 1 story contributed