the disproportionate amount of money the government gives back to you after chipping away at your paychecks from the previous year

verb ꘡ flex

to stunt or show off

January 1st through April 15th marks tax season in the United States — the time of year when individuals prepare the previous year’s financial statements and reports. As a young adult in her early 20s, tax season comes with a mixed bag of emotions ranging from, “OMG I have no idea if my TurboTax report is correct so I hope the feds don’t come after me,” to “How the hell is it legal for the government to take so much of my money?!” and the inevitable ‘save this money vs. treat yo self’ debate.

It’s the second week of March and I get a reminder from my Google Calendar app that reads “LOG INTO TURBOTAX AND GET WHAT’S YOURS!” followed by a series of dollar bill and dancing lady emojis. As I combed through my W-2 form, I shook my head just thinking about how much of that hard-earned money I’ll never see. As I hit the ‘e-file’ button and submitted my 2015 filings, I stopped and reflected on my financial journey over the last five years, which lead to some thoughts around this idea of the tax return flex.

For many, the precursor to the tax return flex is the college refund check flex.

If you’re unfamiliar with the college refund check process, it’s the early Christmas present some college students receive after schools deduct tuition and other academic fees from available financial aid. The leftover cash is refunded to students, thus resulting in a college refund check. People always knew when the refund checks dropped too — folks sprang for name brand food items at the grocery store (no more generic Kroger fruit snacks!), made celebratory trips to the mall, and maybe even planned random weekend getaways.

But things were different in college. The vast majority of us remained shielded from the painstaking responsibilities that come with adulthood and could still rely on our guardians for varying degrees of financial support. Didn’t want to subject yourself to the food offerings in the cafeteria? No problem! Call up Papa John’s and get a pizza sent to your room. And if you really wanted to flex, you’d add on an order of cinnamon sticks — no ramen and hot sauce for you tonight. Spring break coming up and your family isn’t willing to support your drunken debauchery? Don’t sweat it! You have a few extra dollars lying around to help secure your spot in the two-bed hotel room that you and your eight closest friends will share for an entire week. The list goes on and on…

Fast forward to post-grad living, and the picture isn’t as pretty. The stress of rent, bills, groceries (not including the shameful amount you spend on eating out and liquor), student loans, personal grooming (men dare not complain about this expense in the presence of a woman), trips to see friends (since you’re no longer down the hall from one another and experience separation anxiety more often than you’d like to admit) and everything else you now have to pay for and never knew you needed, dangles over your head with every swipe of your debit card. And this is when you’re single! I haven’t even scratched the surface of expenses accrued by young adults who are married or have kids.

There’s a turning point in every young adult’s life when the flex begins to take on a different form.

You commit to making choices that better your financial health and cherish the sacred ‘treat-yo-self’ moment that happens every so often. You start saving more and declare two or three months out of the year ‘frugal month,’ better known as “don’t ask me to go out, cause I’m at home eating frozen Trader Joe’s meals and binge-watching Netflix to avoid blowing my entire paycheck on drinks at the bar.” And you might even set some new financial goals, whether it’s cutting your monthly Uber bill in half or putting away a few dollars each week to contribute to your international travel fund.

The long-term satisfaction of paying off your credit card bill begins to replace the instant gratification you feel when slipping on that new pair of overpriced shoes. You step up your financial literacy game and actually start paying attention to things like 401Ks, Roth IRAs, the stock market and the rising cost of living. You take a step back and consider putting your money toward more intangible experiences that push you to learn something new and yield memories to last a lifetime, and you understand that establishing good financial health now will benefit you in the future.

Money and this idea of the haves and have-nots are the root of so many challenges we face in today’s society. Finances aren’t something people talk about openly, but it’s vital that we, especially as young adults, take care of our financial health. And although tax returns encompass a very small portion of one’s monetary resources, it’s never too early to take that small step forward and upgrade your tax return flex.

What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever used your tax return for? Share in the comment section below.

Oakland, CA native. Black woman in tech. Lover of all things food and wine. Strange obsession with Polaroid photos. Professional ghost writer finding her own voice.

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Kayla Conti

Writing since March 2016 · 3 stories contributed