The other day, I sat back and reflected with friends over punch and the best Publix salsa money can buy. We did what every group of slightly-under-the-influence millennials does: We took turns singing and reminiscing about our favorite childhood movies. Lion King, Tarzan and A Goofy Movie (Tevin Campbell went in on “Eye to Eye”), were all called out and had their soundtracks sung until the bottles were empty and our hearts were merry. But then it hit me: Disney never gave me a black love story.

Before the naysayers hop in with the, “What about The Princess and the Frog?!” I just want to nudge them to go really watch that movie again. Now tell me where in there do you see a blatant #BlackRelationshipGoal. I see a struggling small business owner, some frogs, a hood alligator and a racially-ambiguous man with a tan and an s-curl. Again, show me the Dwyane and Gabby in this film. Great. So back to my point.

Disney has never shown me what black love looks like in animation form on a big screen. I’ve gotten plenty of white men teaching me how I could never look like prince charming, some white women who showed me that blind endless love can take you from the bottom of the ocean to even marrying a naked white man that was raised by gorillas and apparently grew dreadlocks. But yet again, no black love.

Let’s do a childhood check. I’ve gotten; white woman dating an abusive wildebeest-lion thing (who at the end turns into a white guy). I’ve gotten a white woman taking the best power nap of life and falling in love with a white man on a horse. Plot twist! I’ve gotten a white man who is completely invading an entire civilization ending up in an interracial relationship sweeping a Native American woman off of her feet (which is proven to be a false revision of history). I had a white woman running around with one shoe until a white guy brings it to her and they fall in love. Hell, I’ve even gotten two dogs eating spaghetti. But two black people loving each other? Nope.

So as I sat back and reflected on my childhood, it made me wonder, how does a black child raised on Disney ever get to visualize in their mind that they can fall in love with someone that looks like they do? What if they never get that visual in real life? And given the socio-economic structures that be, the black family historically has always been and continues to be under attack. So to not have this visual on TV or at home as a child can really determine how this young black or brown person feels about black love. We’re talking some of the most formative years here. We know how to fall in love with the blonde damsel in distress and the default white prince charming, but being black and falling in love with black people? Nah.

Of course, the role of family and community is supposed to come in to provide everything television doesn’t give us and all that good stuff. But at the end of the day, it doesn’t negate the fact that black love and that Disney “happily ever after” was never shown at my sleepover.

Maybe my children will get to see it someday.

Until then, we have to settle for the racially ambiguous guy with the s-curl.

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