The Dushkins (Alex and Kyle) are obnoxious party promoters who have a standing party that brings in the highest revenue for the ship. Marty hates them, but soon realizes that they hold the key to the deal he needs to put together, so he’s willing to tolerate how obnoxious they are.

Those clowns are the answer? #HouseOfLies pic.twitter.com/AnxmbBtFGZ

— House of Lies (@SHO_HouseOfLies) May 9, 2016

Doug is very, very excited about the ship’s captain, Megan Dunleavy, one of the few women captains in the fleet. She has zero interest in Doug, but is potentially interested in Clyde.

Clyde has been thinking about his future at K&A, and during a heated game of pickup, he tells Marty exactly how he feels. Marty feels like Clyde is simply complaining and brushes him off.

Ben Schwartz as Clyde Oberholt and Don Cheadle as Marty Kaan in House of Lies (Season 5, Episode 05). Photo: Michael Desmond/SHOWTIME

The team quickly realizes that the only way to increase profits and win business is to build a party ship for the Dushkins, which will increase the profits of the cruise line exponentially. They close the deal and do what anyone does after a great day at work — buy shots. Things get pretty wild.

Let’s party! 😜 #HouseOfLies pic.twitter.com/Chn187s6Lc

— House of Lies (@SHO_HouseOfLies) May 9, 2016

At the height of their drunken haze, Marty makes both Clyde and Doug partners at K&A by writing their promotion on napkins. Both are incredibly excited.

Giving away partnerships like Oprah! #HouseOfLies pic.twitter.com/oTwYdkgQ26

— House of Lies (@SHO_HouseOfLies) May 9, 2016

Jeannie and Marty have their umpteenth heart-to-heart of the season, where she believes that they are killing it as parents but then realizes they might not be. To cope with their discomfort, they decide to video chat Phoebe in the middle of the night, which makes everything better.

House of Lies — Photo: Michael Desmond/SHOWTIME

Doug loses his mind and goes to see the ship’s captain, which results in him being locked up until they dock at their destination city. The episode ends with Marty realizing that he promoted Clyde and Doug on accident but has no recollection of doing it.

Whoops! #HouseOfLies pic.twitter.com/jIXvAPMCzp

— House of Lies (@SHO_HouseOfLies) May 9, 2016

Lines that made us lose our chill:

“It’s every little boy’s fantasy to sleep with a ship’s captain. Am I right?” – Doug

“Should I call the Wambulance!?” – Marty

A REAL MOMENT

The Cost of Being a Boss

House of Lies — Photo: Michael Desmond/SHOWTIME

Being a boss has its perks; more responsibility, seniority and usually a bigger paycheck. It also comes with tremendous pressure and unique challenges that you only realize once you’re doing it. Marty is constantly working with competing interests; clients, employees, revenue targets, family, bills, etc. If K&A was to be acquired, he’d get virtually nothing for his effort. Being a manager is cool — until it isn’t and you have to make decisions about other people and their livelihood.

READ NEXT: Dinner dates and dirty diapers: ‘House of Lies’ season 5, episode 4 recap

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