The journey of self-love can be a battle. It can be sparked by insecurities, trauma and societal standards, but the healing from the scars is what makes the work beautiful and make you greater than before. 

“Be Unapologetically You: A Self Love Guide For Women Of Color,” provides tips for women to learn how to know their worth and take on the “creative process and dig deep to find their own soul.” 

“That sent me a message saying that your life doesn’t matter and as a mixed-race woman, coming from both those communities, it was devastating to see that constantly,” Bird said. 

“I felt like it was important to talk about our history,” Bird said. “That’s the most important part in the book and what I go into right away is knowing your history, going and doing the work and taking the time to understand where you came from.”

“There’s a resurgence of people reclaiming themselves, reclaiming their stories, and owning their narrative,” she continued.  “It’s not much different from what I see and what’s happening with Black America, actually.”

Photo: Adeline Bird/Sterling Images

“The trauma of losing someone suddenly changes you,” Bird said. “It changes your whole entire world it changes how you see the world. It changes how you experience the world and so, I felt different.”

“Getting to know myself and really having that time to think and have that space to myself was really really important to me,” she said. Trying new things like going to different spaces, was a part of her healing journey as well.

In her book, the author describes self-love as a spiritual act, because once you begin to love yourself, no one can tell you anything. Bird touched on how people start to learn what is important to them, what boundaries to put up with others and being who they are is “non-negotiable”. 

She considers self-love to be a revolutionary act because you can just be in love with every aspect about yourself and understand that although people may have things to say, it’s important for you to put yourself first, and even embrace your own beauty.

Photo: Adeline Bird pictured with her niece

In her book, she also encourages people to no longer wait for someone else to give them permission to love themselves since we've been conditioned by corporations and governments to be that way for so long. 

“I just think that because we’ve been oppressed for so long and we exist in a white man’s world, we're told that we should wait for permission to try to navigate ourselves and step outside of what we’re conditioned to do,” Bird said.

One of the biggest takeaways she wants people to learn from “Unapologetically You: A Self Love Guide For Women Of Color" is their creativity is not useless.

“People are always going to have something to say,” Bird added. “There is always going to be somebody who's not going to agree with whatever it is that you have to say or whatever it is that you’re creating or even the self-love journey that you’re on. It’s really up to you to decide what you do with that and this is why I say be unapologetically you.”

“I just think that because we’ve been oppressed for so long and we exist in a white man’s world, it’s already hard for us to try to navigate ourselves and step outside of what we’re conditioned to do or what we’re told so we wait for permission,” Bird said. 

“I really hope that people take the tools in the book and make it work for themselves,” she said. “Make it work for their own experience.”

“You’re not broken, you’re not the person that you were 10 years ago,” she said.

To learn more about Bird and her book, visit her site here.

This piece is brought to you in partnership with Toyota.