Social Media has created a large platform for black girls and women that have historically been made to seem invisible and mis-represented in the media. For the first time, we are creating and sharing our own narratives about what it means to be black girls and women. This has even resulted in a hashtag we know as #BlackGirlMagic. I am all about the uplifting of my sistas globally, but for non-black bodies, I want to make sure the systematic, social and psychological needs for black girls, is not lost in misunderstanding what the magic is. To me, the magic is our ability to overcome unimaginable, painful, traumatic experiences. Experiences that have been chosen for us by a white-supremacist, heteronormative patriarchy the day we are born. Everything about being black and a woman is the anti-American dream. Yet, still we rise, and that is what the magic is really about.
Little black girls are left out of the conversations about identity, social change and society improvement. Our struggles are never the topic of local and global conversations. I don’t hear a widespread call to stop promoting the images that endorse the degradation and hyper-sexuality of black girls and women. This pervasive atmosphere leaves us dealing with the trauma of sexual abuse, teen pregnancy, violence and, of course, human trafficking.
I am continually wondering, how do I save myself? There is no liberator out there waiting to rescue me or anyone else from the anti-blackness and sexism in this world. The problems of black girls may never be centered on in government policy or religious institutions on a macro-level in terms of providing resources for health and wellness, education, financial literacy, and empowerment. Therefore, it is up to us as individuals to develop a sense of unity and accountability for ourselves and for each other, and to uplift black girls.Making our girls a priority is vital to create a more just and compassionate society, because girls grow into women who will become mothers that will, in turn, instill values and morals into their children. Our girls and women should be supported in a way that values their thoughts, ideas and dreams, as well as provides healing modalities to address trauma, pain and low self-esteem; living in a world where every girl knows they have value and a purpose is a worthy goal.
How can we love and nurture our girls, if we do not love and nurture ourselves and our inner children? While I was writing my first book Big Words to Little Me: Advice to the Younger Self, I learned that our inner child and the narratives that were created when we were children are what drive us in many of our adult decisions. Our inner child steers how we feel about love, money and both personal and professional relationships. Our childhood experiences have shaped who we have become and unless we take time to clarify what those stories are, only the negative experiences are passed on to our girls.Love and healing should become a priority to each of us. It is up to each individual to lift others up with words of affirmation and words that remind us that we are powerful and beyond limitations, and that we are the saviors and healers of world. Our very presence offers balance to the world. As early as possible, it is important to learn that regardless of what our circumstances are, we have a purpose and we will triumph over challenges we face. Just as our ancestors have.
I believe that mastering self-care is a revolution. Mastering what we eat, and how we heal and nourish our bodies is a revolution too. Supporting and uplifting one other is the beginning of society's transformation to one that values and loves each individual, regardless of the bodies and colors we show up in. We all have a predetermined destiny and a responsibility to both our ancestors and the generations to come. This responsibility pushes us to do everything possible to create a more peaceful and harmonious society. That change will only happen once we become peaceful and harmonious within ourselves and prioritize the well-being and success of our girls — who are the only ones that will continue to bring forth human life.
Our magic isn’t just a trend of hashtag but a process of change, triumph and healing ourselves so that we can stand in the glory we were destined to have.