We must never become desensitized to the issue of sexual assault and rape. With high-profile cases shining a light rape culture, it’s clear that the lines around what qualifies as consent can sometimes become blurred.
"In the U.S., one in three women and one in six men experienced some form of contact sexual violence in their lifetime," according to the National Violence Sexual Resource Center.
In order to bring clarity to consent, Blavity sat down with Hannah Brancato, a Baltimore resident who co-founded FORCE: Upsetting Rape Culture. With a mission to “upset the culture of rape and promote the culture of consent,” this organization was founded in 2010. Here’s what she shared, and what you need to know:
Blavity: How do you define consent?
Hannah Brancato: Consent is an ongoing conversation between sexual partners about what they do and do not want [done] with their body in any kind of sexual situation.
Blavity: If I gave someone consent in the past, do I have to give consent again in the future?
Brancato: Yes. Consent is not like a fixed contract that you sign one time and never look at again; consent is an ongoing and ever-changing conversation. It can also be withdrawn at any time. For example, if I gave consent yesterday, that does not mean I give consent today. That change must be respected.
Blavity: What are different ways you can give consent?
Brancato: We communicate in many different ways. However, I would say that the best consent is verbal. Consent should be clear and enthusiastic.
Blavity: If I consent to one sexual act, does that mean I consent to all?
Brancato: No, because consent is a conversation about what you do and do not want. Giving consent to oral sex is not the same as giving consent to anal sex and vice versa. There must be a conversation between partners. That conversation can about what everyone is agreeing to do can happen before.
Blavity: How do you withdraw consent during a sexual act?
Brancato: Consent is an ongoing, enthusiastic conversation. You can ask questions like, “Are you OK? Do you want me to slow down? Did that feel good?”
Also, pay attention to body language. If your partner freezes or is crying that's a good sign that it's time to check in.
Blavity: Why do you think there is so much gray area around defining consent?
Brancato: I think it's because we are so steeped in rape culture. We see messaging every day saying we can't control our own bodies. But I actually don't think consent is gray. I think it's very clear, but we — as a culture — are learning how to practice it.
Blavity: After giving consent, are you allowed to change your mind during the sexual activity?
Brancato: Yes. There is no such thing as being not allowed to do something, in regards to your own body. You are entitled to withdraw consent at any time.
Blavity: How should my silence in sexual encounters be perceived? If I don't say “no,”does that mean “yes” by default?
Brancato: No. You have to explicitly say “yes” when giving consent. Enthusiastic consent means that people are vocally and clearly engaged in a sexual activity. If it's not clear, then there is a possibility of [engaging in what would be considered] a sexual assault.
Blavity: If I'm at a party and decide to go home with a guy or girl, does that automatically equate to a form of consent?
Brancato: You still have to give [verbal] consent. Just because someone is showing interest, it does not equal giving consent for sexual acts.
Blavity: If I'm under the influence of alcohol or other drugs and say “yes” to sexual acts, would that be considered a valid form of consent?
Brancato: Alcohol complicates consent, [and] being under the influence is another barrier to giving clear consent. You can't give informed consent while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs. [Also], you cannot give or get consent if the other person is not conscious.
Blavity: Where do I go If I've been sexually assaulted?
Brancato: This is different for everybody. You can go to the hospital first, if you do not want to go to the police. [Although] there is no one-size-fits-all solution, you can call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-4673, and they will provide resources for your specific situation.
Blavity: What are four things everyone must know about consent?
Brancato: Consent is enthusiastic. Consent is ongoing. Consent can be withdrawn at any time. Consent is freely given.
Let's keep the conversation going. What questions do you have about consent? Let us know in the comments below.
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