If you're a Netflix junkie like me, you may have watched the new Dear White People series. I was a little late in watching the series because quite frankly, I didn't know what to expect. I'd seen the movie and had mixed feelings about it. Don't get me wrong, I thought it addressed some important issues, but at the same time, it wasn't what I was hoping for when I heard a title like "Dear White People."
Fast forward to now, after binge watching all of my favorite shows and being seriously thirsty for something new to watch, lo and behold, I ended up binging on Dear White People. Surprisingly, I liked the show significantly more than the movie. Perhaps it was the fact that I was able to see more in depth angles of the characters and their relationships, as well as the reasoning for why they are the way that they are. This also left me feeling a bit of disdain for characters I previously thought I liked, and empathy for characters I formerly thought I hated.
Specifically, Samantha "Sam" White (Logan Browning) and Colandrea "Coco" Connors (Antoinette Robertson).
Now, from what I remember of Dear White People the movie, which I have never watched more than once, Coco was doing some things that were not only annoying, but made her extremely hard for me to be able to look past and find something in her to relate to. Seeing that I consider myself fairly woke, I automatically gravitated to Sam. It just seemed right, she was the one trying to get white people to wake up and change the narrative through the use of her platforms. Having been in predominantly white spaces during my middle and high school careers, Sam was who I felt I always had been. Meaning that I was always trying to wake the school up and get them to understand where I was coming from. I was always trying to get white people to see the issues they were helping to perpetuate, and change them. However, now looking back at my private school career and paralleling it with the characters of Dear White People, I realize that in many ways, I can relate more to Coco than Sam. Perhaps it's fair to say Coco gets some things wrong, but she doesn't get enough credit for the things that she gets right.
What I saw in Coco was a vulnerability that I have felt before, and I thank Antoinette for bringing that to this character. Coco is a girl from Hyde Park, Chicago who, just like any other black woman in college, is trying to find her way and her place in the world. She describes herself as being born woke because of the things she has seen, and therefore she tries to run away from the reality she was born into. That's the disconnect between her and Sam. Sam, who is biracial, didn't realize she was black until second grade when she wasn't invited to a classmate's sleepover. She is seemingly trying to make up for the part of her that isn't black by being a revolutionary. Coco has always known she was black. She has always felt the repercussions of her blackness and is looking for a way to combat that. Perhaps the way that both women deal with the reality of who they are can be toxic, but understanding Coco's background leaves me feeling like not enough people give her a chance.
Just like many black girls, from the time she was a child she was taught to equate dark skin to ugliness. Not only was she criticized for her blackness, but also for her economic upbringing. She's had to witness the violence and pain that comes along with being from a place that people deem unimportant because of its economic standing and racial population. She deals with the effects of colorism in dating as well as social caste. She's wounded, and rightfully so. The thing is, for her, she believes that assimilation and acquiring power and status are how she can earn her seat at the table. Her tactics may not be beneficial for black people outside of herself, but Sam's revolutionary tactics don't seem to necessarily always be for the bettering of the people either. Both have something to prove. For Sam, it's often times to herself, and for Coco it seems to be to everyone else.
There's a quote from Coco on the show that really made me realize who she was. She says, "Dear white people, you made me hate myself as a kid so now I hate you, and that's my secret shame."
I've been there. I've felt that. I think we've all been there at some point. It's the root of the way that everyone has chosen their path. It forces some people to run towards the institution of whiteness, and it causes others to fight it tooth and nail. Some people run to the sunken place, and some people run and get out. However, before we count people out, we have to meet them where they are and understand we may have more in common than we realized.
I had the honor of talking with Antoinette more about the character she portrays on Dear White People, as well as learning more about who she is. I asked her a few questions, and speaking with her made me love what she's doing with Coco even more.
Photo: Riker Brothers Photography / Hair: Richard Grant / Makeup: Jazzmene / Styling: Madison Guest
Blavity: What was your initial reaction to the character Coco? Did you love her, hate her or see something in her you resonated with?
Antoinette Robertson: When I watched the movie, I loved Teyonah [Parris]. I think she's brilliant, but I saw Coco differently. To be perfectly honest, I just wanted my chance to show them my interpretation of who I saw her to be, because I completely understand living in a world that misunderstands you. No she's not angry, no she's not bitchy. She's a wounded girl that needs to heal. So I feel like, if I got a chance to show people her heart, they would fall in love with her too.
I know that you're an educated woman. Was your college experience anything like Coco's? Did you ever find yourself trying to fit in?
You know what, I didn't. I went to a school where we were definitely a minority, so I kind of kept my nose down. I was modeling at the same time, and trying to get a degree in chemistry. I grew up partially in Jamaica as well. So I grew up in a predominantly black environment and then went to a predominantly not black environment, so I could feel the difference, in terms of otherness. But I had a tendency to gravitate to people who were Caribbean or African as well, and I didn't even realize I was doing it. I dealt with micro-aggressions, and I've dealt with people trying to get me to conform to Eurocentric ideals of beauty. In terms of her not accepting herself, I've had moments where I had to navigate the world's idea of what being a black woman looks like. Her struggle is definitely her own, so I can understand from the standpoint of people wanting me to be something I'm not, and pushing against that to stand in my truth.
One dynamic of the show is Coco and Sam's relationship. In episode IV, the episode where we learn a little bit more about who Coco is, there's a scene between Coco and Sam in the radio station. Coco says, "You get away with murder because you look more like them than I do. That's your light skinned privilege." Do you think that being a dark-skinned woman has ever affected people's perception of you, or even affected your perception of yourself?
Most definitely. This is why I gravitated to the character that people didn't understand. You can feel in society the "non-threatening" factor. I have a best friend who's insanely gorgeous; she's biracial. I feel like people are out the gate more intimidated by me because they deem her non-threatening. Now, that's one instance, I can't speak for all dark skin or light skin women. I don't play into these tactics, but I'm well aware they exist. I'm well aware society has a way of putting us against each other. Has it affected my perception of myself? No. I have a very strong mother. Her fortitude and my spirituality have always been the things that have grounded me more than anything. I've never really let other people's projections be felt.
Photo: Riker Brothers Photography / Hair: Richard Grant / Makeup: Jazzmene / Styling: Madison Guest
Another dynamic of the show is Coco's relationship with Troy. In the same episode, Coco references his past relationship with Sam and says, "You're so quick to claim girls like her, but I get a come thru text." What advice do you have for all the women out there who are like Coco, and are dealing with a Troy?
Stop making excuses for a man. If he wants to call you, he will. If he's interested in you, he'll make his interest known. Own your power, know your worth and walk away from something that does not serve you. Don't try to make something into something it's not. I think sometimes as women, we create this backstory as to why this person isn't giving us the affection we desire, rather than walking away. Love him, but love you more.
Lastly, up until the end of the season when we see the black experience ultimately bring them together, there's a kind of "Sam vs. Coco" deal. So my question is, who do you feel like you relate to more: Sam the "revolutionary," or Coco, the woman just trying to get a seat at the table?
I feel like in my world, a hybrid of the two is necessary. One can protest all you want because we have documentation that protests have brought about change. However, we also need people who have a seat at the table who can make lasting change in the government. We need both. Instead of shaming one group of people for not being the other, we should embrace what everyone wants to bring to the movement, and strengthening our numbers to bring about lasting change. Society has a tendency to judge people for being one thing and not the other. If we communicate and join forces, we can bring about lasting change together.
After talking to Antoinette, I realized that was the thing I was getting wrong. It's why I initially hated Coco and loved Sam. I wasn't letting people bring what they had to the movement if it wasn't what I wanted to see. In a way, I don't think most people realize what they can bring to the table if protesting isn't their ministry. It's not always about the idea of if you aren't one way, you're automatically wrong. Blackness and black people are multifaceted, therefore, what we uniquely bring to the movement will be helpful as well.
I say all that to say this: Do I always agree with Coco? No. Do I think she's without fault? Absolutely not. However, I understand her.
My hope is that more people will give her a chance because she's way more relatable than she gets credit for. I also ask you to look at all the Cocos in your life, and maybe cut them some slack. Just like Sam and Coco at the end of season one, you may realize that the feud between you is truly over nothing.
