Last week, my nephew and I were driving around the city running errands and like usual, he was talking a mile a minute, not giving my ears a second to process his many inquiries. He's eight years old and is fascinated by nature, constantly asking me scientific questions that require my extensive Google research in order to correctly answer. Because we were in the car, I couldn't touch my phone and tried my best to answer questions like "what is the rate of speed at which leaves fall from the sky in November?". 

After about 15 minutes of his nonstop questionaire, my boy then grew quiet and I noticed him looking at my radio in bewilderment.

He turns to me and asks in the most innocent tone, "Ty, Ty, why do we have to listen to old-timey music every time we get in your car?"

Exclusive image of me.

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Okay, I didn't quite respond like this because for starters, I don't use the n-word, but my body went into every kind of Kevin Hart overreaction. I read this child for filth. How dare he get in my car and criticize my music? I had just bought him a Happy Meal, too. Rude and ungrateful. At the time, Deborah Cox's "Sentimental" was streaming and I told him that he would indeed put some respect on her name and every other R&B artist that played. 

I told him, "If you don't like my music in my car, then walk."

Exclusive image of him looking at me.

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Ashton responded to my tirade, "Uggh, nevermind." We were silent for the rest of the ride home.

I totally morphed into my parents who used to say, "Ya'll young people don't know nothing about real music." I'll be 30 next year and spending time with my nephews, in conjunction with my aching knees, remind me that I am aging. Not just physically, but in my tastes for entertainment.

For a second, I forgot about our 20 year age difference. The closest representation of R&B music for him are Chris Brown, Bryson Tiller, Tory Lanez and Drake.

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When he gets in my car, or any of my passengers for that matter, they are exposed to the kind of love songs that will instantly put you in your feelings. 

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The kind of songs that pull on your heartstrings, reminding you of a time when life was easy, folks could harmonize and actually loved one another.

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The music industry no longer produces classic, quality love songs. Don't argue with me. I took a poll on Twitter, asking my followers to tweet me the greatest love songs of all-time. No particular genre, just their favorite love songs. None of the responses were from the last decade.

Music today reflects our "situationships" and hookup culture. The message in modern music says, "I want to be with you but we can't be together, however, you're mine but don't tag me in no IG posts and I better not see you with nobody else. I'll let you know if I love you one day, maybe."

Let's take Bryson Tiller's "Exchange" for example. In one breath he says, "So gimme all of you in exchange for me." In the next, he proclaims, "Maybe, I'm low key feelin' you, don't be cynical. I'ma fuck you over, wanna fuck you over then again the truth is I ain't really here to start problems."

This is very problematic. Do you want her or not? The words send mixed signals. Someone reading this is arguing, "Bryson Tiller is Trap Soul and blah blah, she doesn't know what she's talking about let me get angry in the comments to prove just how much I disagree." Yes, this genre is categorized as Trap Soul, not R&B but the subject-matter is about matters of the heart.  

Back in the day, don't get me wrong, love songs were just about being a fuck boy and having one night stands. But you know what, it sounded so good.

Let's take Shirley Murdock's 1986 hit, "As We Lay" later recorded by Kelly Price. "What a lovely night we had yeah, yeah
As we shared each other's love, we forgot about all the pain we caused. As we slept the night away." Such a beautiful song about having a night of romance then you hear the words, "It's morning and now it's time for us to say goodbye. Goodbye baby. You're leaving me. I know you've got to hurry home to face your wife."

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An entire song about being intimate with another woman's husband. Still a classic. While they were doing dirty, the message of the song was so much more. Connecting with a person that is not yours to keep. Same deal with Atlantic Starr's "Secret Lovers" and Xscape's "You're My Little Secret." Love songs were just as trifling back in the day however the lyrics were so melodic and easy on the ears. There was passion in music about infidelity.

Even the sexual songs were pleasantly sensual and respectful, often laced with innuendo. You know that good baby making music.

Songs that made you respond like this every time they blasted through your speakers.

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Marvin Gaye's, "Sexual Healing" says, "Come take control, just grab a hold of my body and mind, soon we'll be making it, honey. I'll be feeling fine. You're my medicine, open up and let me in." The lyrics were pretty suggestive for 1982, yet and still the underlying message was love. Teddy Pendergrass wanted to turn off the lights. Betty Wright wanted it tonight. Silk called a meeting in the bedroom. Artists were invested in "fire and desire."

Johnny Gill tried to get the mood right but nobody bought that album other than me. "You still make me rise with those sweet bedroom eyes. And how could I forget? How much I love the sex and you're still the love of my life."

Even the ladies were commanding about bedroom activites in the most subtle way. Janet Jackson's "Anytime, Any Place", TLC's "Red Light Special" and SWV's "Downtown", proclaimed sexual desires without being too raunchy.   Brandy's "I Wanna Be Down (Remix)" brought the heat. MC Lyte asserted, "You the type of brotha I wanna sink my teeth in" as Yo-Yo expressed, "I'll be your caramel motel, you can get it want it."

Kids today are not versed in the language of slow jamz. The beat is hot, then you really begin to listen to what the artists is saying.

August Alsina's "I Luv This Sh*t (Remix)" featuring Trey Songz and Chris Brown, the lyrics proclaim, "The way I f*ck her, you would think I luv this b*tch."

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Lyrics from artists today sound like testimony in a rape trial. At least Ro James asked for "Permission."

Speaking of Trey Songz, "Panty Droppa" the interlude to "Neighbors Know My Name" on his  2009 album "Ready"  indeed sent panties flying. It's one of those albums you can listen to from start to finish. The album was about love, I'm not sure if the love was unrequited but in the subsequent years, the love songs diminished and he began settling for "bitches and dranks."

What happened to openly expressing love without shame? "My Girl", "I Just Called to Say I Love You", "Ain't No Mountain High Enough", "This Will Be (An Everlasting Love)", "How Many Ways", "Cater 2 U", "Always and Forever"..the list goes on and on.

The makings of a good love song meant artists stood out in the rain over love.

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That catch pneumonia for you love.

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The New Edition biopic on BET proved that people, young and old, continue to crave authentic love songs. For the first time in a decade, NE is back in the Top 40. Their music can stand the test of time. Thirty years from much of today's sound won't be around.

My words aren't intended to overshadow those artists genuinely invested in love. I have to give it to the Miguel, Bruno Mars, Solange, Tamar Braxton and Childish Gambinos of the world.They consistently bring soulful and quality love songs to the table.  Thank goodness for streaming options. I just can't get down with the message in today's love songs. And I do use the term love loosely. 

Music evolves with every generation, I totally get it. And here, maybe I am just being an old soul. As Al B. Sure said in his Unsung episode, "There is still a generation of women that want to be told they are loved." That's me, a hopeless romantic.

If it's not that "Can You Stand The Rain",  "My, My, My" "Let's Stay Together", "Between the Sheets", kind of "Tender Love" in "Sweet November", you can keep it.

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