I was supposed to give a talk to a group of young athletes about having a great quality of life after sports but it didn’t end up happening. I thought about it and thought about it, then realized that I still wanted to give this talk, so I’m writing it and hopefully a coach or athlete sees it and shares it with others. This is what I was going to say: 

Quality of life is about being content in your daily routine of living. As athletes, we sometimes live for the crescendo, and when we come down, we are constantly looking for the next high. As much as we may hate it, we will be “regular people” at some point. For all my fellow athletes, you know what I mean when I say that. It’s about preparing for tomorrow today and not letting life happen to you but you happening to life.

You don't know me and I don't know you. We're just meeting each other, but I've been where you are. I've been sitting in those very seats while people like me came in and told me to train hard, follow my passion, and get good grades while I was in school. I appreciate the knowledge, the wisdom, and the enthusiasm that they shared. What they didn't know was that I didn’t know what my passion was, so following it was going to be difficult as hell. What they didn't ask me was what I wanted to get out of this workshop. They didn't know my hopes, my fears, my dreams, my aspirations, or my struggles. I guess that’s not their fault. They were just coming to speak and maybe get some exposure — which is cool. So I'm here to talk with you; not to you, not at you, but with you. 

The best piece of advice I ever received was this:  “when you’re talking to a group of people, you have to make them feel safe. You have to give them permission to be honest. When you do that, they're going to tell you the truth. They will tell you what is really on their mind."

If you don't make them feel safe, they’re going to give you an answer that they think you want to hear. That doesn't help them or anybody else in the room.