I woke up this morning, to see one of my Facebook friend's share tweets from Charlamagne Tha God requesting women of color use their voice the same way as political commentator Tomi Lahren

When I read this, I instantly got mad because this is yet another example of a man (usually black) overlooking the accomplishments of black women and using white women to set the standard. It’s frustrating. It is infuriating for me to know and watch black women who use their voices and influence all the time to uplift our community be disrespected by tweets like this.  It’s crazy to me that Charlamagne would praise someone who openly opposes the fight for his life. But it’s okay because she’s white and beautiful, right?

Tweets like Charlamagne are incredibly hurtful to those of us who are using our voice to help out the community. Franchesca Ramsey does this on MTV’s “Decoded” where she not only entertains but also educates her audience on some of the social injustices people face each day. But you know what? She’s not white and blonde, so it’s not happening, right? Or Issa Rae, who created a representation for a kind of black girl that is often neglected by both black and white media alike. Issa was able to bring her show to HBO. But we need more young black women to speak up right? Jouelzy, a YouTuber who also speaks about current events, and is currently leading her smart brown girl movement, is she also not doing enough? What about the black content creators who started the B.O.M.B. makeup challenge to bring attention towards black-owned makeup brands? What about Jackie Aina who regularly calls out the makeup industry for their lack of shade ranges and other social injustices, like Marc Jacobs' blatant appropriation of our culture

The list could go on, but of course, these women are overlooked because their skin is too dark and their hair is too curly.

I am over being compared to white women. Especially being compared to ordinary white women. When we hear of a black man publically proclaiming his love for the “snow bunnies,” it’s usually followed by some nonsense about why they don’t like black women. According to them, all of us are too loud, we’re too angry, our hair is too nappy or too short. Our skin is too dark, and if they were to date one of us, she had to be light skin.  But according to them, we are the only race of women who are angry and loud. But those qualities on other races of women are okay because they’re not black. 

I don’t hate white women, and I have nothing against interracial relationships between white women and black men. I honestly believe true love has no color. But I do think white supremacy has played a role in some of our dating preferences and beauty standards. It plays a significant role in the fight for gender equality. We'll be reminded of this when we celebrate the centennial of white women's right to vote in the year 2020, whether you are conscious of it or not. All I’m saying is that I would like to be left out of the discussion. I no longer want to see posts on Facebook and Instagram of a curvy white woman, with the caption stating “repost this to make a black girl mad” or “white girls are evolving," as if a black woman's only contribution to you is our bodies. 

Some of you can’t seem to differentiate your lust for black women’s body, for the actual love for us as humans.

I just want people to acknowledge their misogynoir and stop making white women the standard.  There is a particular kind of hatred towards black women and we need to recognize that it exists.  I’m tired of being the “bad guy.” Women of all races should not be put into these nice little archetypes that you use to pin us against each other. Black women, like any other race of women, are extremely different, beautiful, and should not be put into your stereotypical box. It’s played out, and we are not your doormat to be walked all over.  

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