As an avid football fan, I am more than excited that the season is kicking off next week. Despite my feelings on Cam Newton’s refusal to acknowledge that he is a black man in America, I still can’t wait to see the rematch between him and the Denver Broncos. There are just certain players that you wanna see tackle more than talk. Cam Newton and Richard Sherman top my list. If this was about two people in denial of being black and thinking that race is merely a crayon that you can freely choose, then they would be the highlight.

But I have a deeper issue here.

Within the last week, we have heard more talk about Colin Kaepernick refusing to stand for the national anthem than we have heard about transaction lists and injuries. Somehow preseason and team cuts have taken a back seat to one man’s decision to do something that he is not required to do–stand.

But what about those who do stand?

The players who have let us down on and off the field. The ones we’ve seen time and time again get arrested for DUIs, domestic violence and even drugs. Yet, the players guilty of these crimes continue to stand instead of keeping their hands and bodily fluids to themselves while their fans find excuses for them. When sports enthusiasts purchase jerseys, send fan mail, and cheer from the sidelines, they signal support beyond the game.

Colin Kaepernick can do as he pleases and needs no additional commentary from any of us. However, there are some NFL figures who would be better off sticking to the playbook instead of reading Kaepernick. First up, New York Giants coach Ben McAdoo. Upon learning of Kaepernick’s stance, coach decided to put in his two cents.

“You know what, the way we operate for the national anthem, we consider it a small gesture to those who served and sacrificed their lives for our country, and for us to play and coach in this great game,” McAdoo told reporters on Monday. “I’d be disappointed if one of our guys chose not to stand.”

*Raises hand*

Put me in the game coach.

So you will be disappointed in your players not standing for the national anthem but you won’t stand up and speak about or on the fact that you granted a $4 million contract to a player that was arrested for beating his ex wife? Josh Brown, kicker for the Giants, has had a protective order put out against him, suspended for one game in 2015 after being arrested for a domestic violence incident, and an ex-wife who has described to police being beaten on over 20 occasions including while she was pregnant.

Was McAdoo “disappointed?” Possibly. If so, he hasn’t said expressed it publicly.

Coach, I consider it a small gesture and a great way to keep empathy if you would talk to your guys about beating women before an incident happens as much as you talk to the press about the national anthem.

I could provide receipts all day of players who have let us down but continue to stand for the anthem, yet not for appropriate conduct on and off the field. My final receipt is for Steelers player, Ben Roethlisberger. The quarterback announced that he is not in favor of Kaepernick’s decision.

“When it comes to the National Anthem and the flag, I think it stands for something different. You know, like you said, family, brothers, my grandfather served in the Navy—people that have served this country — men and women who’ve lost their lives…to me that’s the National Anthem we stand and support because they give us the freedom to play this game. We are so, so lucky to play a game that we love…and that’s because we have the freedom that soldiers have given us,” he told ESPN.

Again, no one forced him to speak on the matter or begged for a quote, but here we are. Roethlisberger was accused of rape and the DA decided not to prosecute him.

According to the National Sexual Violence Resource Center, one in five women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime. 683,000 adult American women are forcibly raped each year. This equals 56,916 per month; 1,871 per day; 78 per hour; and 1.3 per minute. Only 16% of rapes are ever reported to the police. Why? Because victims are afraid. What’s even more frightening is when your violation and dehumanizing experience brings public scrutiny by people who personify rape culture. It is no longer safe to be a woman and seek justice after sexual assault, especially when you’re up against a prominent figure.

So Mr. Roethlisberger, what is your stance on America’s growing trend of sexual assault? The national anthem should be the least of his worries.

As a fan and especially as a fan with a uterus, I am more upset about players and coaches talking more about violating the national anthem than violating women. Must we catch our encounters on tape to prove that these players are just as inappropriate as the cops who gun us down, too? #Stopaskingpermission forces me to consider those who have let us all down as fans yet continue to stand for dirty tactics. As long as these kinds of players are still standing, Colin Kaepernick looks even better sitting in solidarity.

But what about those who do stand?

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