13 things women shouldn't apologize for
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Standing up for yourself
Calling out the 'isms'Vocally combating racism, sexism, classism, ageism and any of the other 'isms,' is often looked at with disdain. As much as the world will try to police our bodies, they will certainly attempt to police our words. Words have power, and as Fredrick Douglass said, "power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and never will." Don't apologize for speaking up!
Showing up for your sisterSisterhood is so important every single day. It's easy to let pettiness diminish our alliances with each other, and true, authentic, consistent sisterhood is work that's well worth it. We have to show up for each other, celebrating each other's brilliance and triumph. And we must do so without pause or apology
Calling out your sisterThere's two sides to the coin of sisterhood, but they both equate to support. If one of my musician sisters has an off-key performance, does it really help her to tell her that it was lit? Honesty can be challenging, but if it comes from a place of love and concern, we shouldn't be regretful for offering feedback. Apologizing for bringing attention to mistakes, bad habits and destructive behavior is counterproductive. We have to stop apologizing for supporting our sisters in this way. Granted, everyone isn't ready to hear that
Being educatedSeveral reports have shown that black women are now the most educated group in the US. We don't make the most, we don't have the most opportunity, yet somehow we've persevered toward higher education and scholastic achievement. That's nothing to scoff at or apologize for. I read an article where the basic premise was that "marrying down" — meaning marrying someone without an equal level of education — could "spell financial ruin, especially for black women." Education is never something to apologize for because it is supposed to create access for the person receiving it and anyone connected to them. Our being educated as a group will be a benefit to those we marry, regardless of their educational standing
How you lookThis one is difficult. We are constantly bombarded with images and narratives that say we should look a certain way, or else we're wrong. Remember that although there is always room for improvement, loving the skin you're in is an act of bravery and resistance against the forces who would tell you that you aren't beautiful as you are
a good book on the couch with some popcorn and wine (because you lightweight have been wanting to jock Olivia Pope's style). Self-care is a necessity, so no need to apologize for tapping in