I remember right after college telling my best friend, who had recently turned into my boyfriend, “This ain’t no hood love! Don’t put me through a bunch of unnecessary sh*t.”
Hearing Mary J. Blige’s song in the background, “We Got Hood Love,” prompted me to make this statement, because all I could think of was the movie Baby Boy when I thought of a ghetto love story. If I had it my way, I would always choose a boring love story over one that drove me crazy. I was 23 and wanted to be married by 30. Who had time for foolishness? Not I!
I came from a Rev Run's House type of family. People came over to my house to see the black American family dream. My parents loved endlessly. The occasional times they argued, it was passionately, but they forgave continually. They really showed me a healthy view of love and partnership. I refused to have anything other than that.
In an era where true love and marriage seems to be fading into a thing of the past, hood love is making vulnerable, true love popular again, thanks to Jay and Bey, Cardi and Offset, the Wopsters and others! I am elated at their contribution to the culture! I don’t care if people call it a stunt or claim these relationships won’t last. All I know is that a bunch of these rap stars are creating happy love stories for us to drool over. Regardless of what their music says, they are wife’n up their ride or die chicks and sailing off into sunsets. If this is what hood love is these days, I'm cool with it. If it gets me a ring like Kim K., why not try it out! I’m kidding, my simple love life is fine.
Yet, what I will say is that the new wave of "ghetto fabulous" fairytale marriages is showing a generation repulsed by nuptials, it’s cool to dedicate yourself to the one you love. I like how they parade that love in front of the world. So what if they're getting hefty checks to get wedding specials on our favorite networks, they are giving the next generation hope. Love may not be perfect, but it’s worth it when you find the right one!
I am not calling these love stories "hoodtastic" with a derogatory, superfluous, stereotypical tone. I admire their hard work toward success, and their music that pays homage to their humble beginnings. #HoodLove, after all, is a positive these days. We all know there is no roadmap to love, but as long as you go into your relationship with a willingness to sacrifice, patience and a desire to grow together daily, you’ll be alright.
I love that popular meme that says, “If it ain’t that '90s R&B type of love, I don’t want it!” Why is '90s music such a standard for our generation? It is because men weren’t afraid to sing their emotions. The songs gave us stories of passion, pursuit and heartbreak. Ladies sang about the innocence and excitement surrounding falling in love. I am worried about the next generation because their love songs include loving money, cutting people off and never settling down. Sheesh!
Before I go into a rant let me just say, this is why the hood love stories matter now, tomorrow, and forever! Kids are not watching Martin and Gina, the Huxtables or, shoot, even 7th Heaven anymore. I am OK with that, as long as they have something positive to aspire to. Depictions of healthy relationships that showcase respect, dedication and long-lasting love are vital. We need to keep showcasing love and family. It is a building block to society and, most of all, so darn beautiful to see!
